Little Funny #1:
Enticed by a television promotion, my wife ordered a popular exercise machine on a 30-day trial offer.
Two weeks later she decided not to buy it, and called UPS to arrange for pickup.
The next day the UPS driver arrived at our house. "Oh, no, not another one of these," he said. "All I've been doing is delivering these machines, then picking them up. The only person getting exercise from these things is me!"
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Little Funny #2:
Judge asks the defendant, “Why did you steal that car, Mr. Jones?”
Mr. Jones looks down, “I just had to get to work for an important meeting.”
The judge keeps asking, “Well why didn't you take a bus?”
Mr. Jones looks up, surprised, “Don't you need a special license to drive the bus?”
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